I stood in front of a mirror for an hour

at 4 this morning. Or yesterday morning. Or something.

I filmed myself doing this.

And then I watched myself standing in front of the mirror.

While standing there, things got blurry and my mind got blurry and nothing made sense and then everything made sense and then everything turned white and black and spotty colors and then I thought about those things that keep everyone up at night when you get into that funk and can't get out. 

That was pretty awful, because I really needed to sleep, and for me, these funks last from a few days to a week or so. Which is good for writing and art making, but bad for any factor related to happiness. 

I thought about these dreams I keep having about people I hardly know, or people I've never seen before in my life that somehow I'm madly in love with or best friends with or something. But I don't know who they are. So that's weird. I thought about you, probably. Because I thought about everyone, at least once. And then I thought about what I was doing with my life and then I questioned my insecurities and then I got mad at all of you for I'm not sure what reason. And then I got mad at just one of you. But then I forgot and I thought about photography and asked myself weird questions in my head about it and I second guessed myself a lot. I forget the assignment, or if there really was one other than standing in front of a mirror. I don't really remember if we were supposed to think about anything in particular. I didn't.

While watching it, I realized my eyes are a bit uneven and I can't decide if they're too far apart or too close together. Also my nostrils are different sizes. I blink normally though, I think. And I sway a lot. My hair has no order and I look pissed off the whole time. And then my eyes got all glazed over at about the time my mind started wandering, I think. And I started to look around a lot. 

 But my bathroom mirror is pretty clean, so that's cool. 

My knees hurt afterwards.